i finally got my answer. i knew the answer inside me that I wasn't interested beyond being great friends or "brothers" in his terminology. but i just get confused signals, so i was presented an opportunity to ask the question - "do you see me as a potential bf?", well in a less direct manner which i usually do.
through a series of sms, but it too a phone conversation to clear the air. what prompted me to ask the question was the gesture that I did that made me wonder if there's more than just good friends btw both of us.
on Tuesday, after my swim at Delta, he actually waited for me outside the pool to pick me up for dinner eventhough we didn't actually plan to meet up that day. how many of us actually do surprise pickup of our friends. well, i don't.
later that night, i msg him and thanked him for dropping by and said that it was a very nice gesture. his reply was he's even nicer to his bf. so i replied, "so there're upgrade options?" and "do i get to upgrade?". his reply back was "huh, what upgrade?". I replied nvm, and then the next day, we had a chat on the phone. all things cleared, he said that once a brother, there's no possibility of being lovers. so there. i had the answer.
moving on, i wonder if this changes the status quo? oh well, i'm sure it does, usually when someone show's interest in me but i'm just not into him, i will somehow be of less in touch so that the other person gets the message or either i wouldn't want him to harp on the feelings as i would know i cannnot reciprocate.
whoever I picks as his bf, the guy would be a lucky guy.
No you don't know the one
Who dreams of you at night;
And longs to kiss your lips
And longs to hold you tight
Oh I'm just a friend.
That's all I've ever been.
You give your hand to me,
And then you say, "Goodbye."
I watched you walk away,
Beside the lucky guy
Oh, you'll never ever know
The one who loved you so.
Well, you don't know me.
Ray Charles - You Don't know me
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